Saturday 10 August 2013

What others have to say - Depression, healing, and pull your self together

There is a bubble of this kind of conversation across the web the past couple of days -

On Ship of Fools there is a discussion on Blog and the kind of attitudes the writer has had to face. I deeply admired her grace in writing to the church leadership and, allowing for the possibility that they may not have intended the harm, to explain it.  The response was horrifying - we meant that, and you should be alright with it, I had problems to and pulling myself through with prayer worked so it must do for everyone.  Forget being vulnerable during any healing time, and certainly not long term, full exposure to jolly happy faith is what you need.

On the other side, theologically and practically, is not the magic healing but the insistence that you don't have a problem in the first place. As espoused by Giles Fraser - yes we need to tackle the underlying sources of stress, and injustice and zero hours contracts and bedroom tax and.... BUT that doesn't mean that depression doesn't exist.  Yes and some of us take pills, I don't take pills to make me happy or hide from the stresses - I take them to enable me to cope, and when there are stresses I can manage, but actually even without the stress I need them to manage in my plodding way.

It is important not to label the wide range of normal life as abnormal or ill, and so Giles I do get some of what you are trying to say - but there are a lot of us who are far from your category of those  'for whom happiness can be reclaimed by doing a bit more exercise or being more sociable'.  In the depths of depression both of these are about as accessible as Mount Everest with out oxygen, tents or those ice grabbling things.

There is a response to Giles Fraser here - highlighting the distinctions.

But despite the pull yourself together, nothing is wrong on one side, and the pray and it will all go away on the other, in the middle are churches and Christians who care and love. Sometimes struggling and say or do the wrong thing but open to being helped to be better helpers. And in the middle there are people who live it, who know it, and between us and with God's help try to hold each other up.

Thursday 8 August 2013

Healing and Wellness.... (part 2)

Meanwhile, aside from my personal questions about healing and reaction to something that seemed too formulaic, and away from our local aims, I have in the past couple of days encountered some scary current teaching about sickness and healing in parts of the charismatic churches.

Yes I know that some will note this as about as newsworthy as the proverbial bears in the wood (though the pendant in me recognising that over here that would indeed be 'a great surprise') but I still found these cases shocking.

It is common among those Christians who believe God dramatically heals on a very frequent basis today to encourage people to be prayed for in events and services, often in a highly charged atmosphere of expectation.  Miracle reports can fly about easily, but without the means to check the real story - like most of the internet and press!  People can leave hurt if healing does not occur as the implication is that God wants to heal them so if it doesn't happen then something is getting in the way - maybe they don't have enough faith etc.

These days I have had the impression that such implications are implicit and many groups and leaders are keen to distance themselves from that whilst still praying for and expecting healings, also keen to encourage people to stay on medications until a doctor says so.

There is a tent mission going on this week not far from me but just out of my patch so I was googling to find out more, who was behind it, which churches, what was going on etc.  In doing so I landed on the website of one of the key supporting churches and because I like background input but not music, and being curious, I played one of the recent sermon podcasts. The title said it was about communion, and I wondered what that style of church had to say compared to my more liturgical siblings.  It didn't really catch my attention and was just background until near the end when (and I replayed a couple of times to check I had heard right) the preacher stated that whilst not all sickness is caused by lack of repentance a lot is, and if we really repented before coming to communion, and stopped being divided two ways between God and the world then those sicknesses would disappear.

So the bit in the Bible about not coming to communion unworthily or you will bring judgement on yourself is being taken as literal sickness as God's punishment??  And this is being offered as the true word, how many in that congregation will have gone home wondering what they have done that they or a loved one is sick?

Then this morning a mention of one of these Christian festivals but one I hadn't heard of, so back to the websearch, and on their website a video clip about 'How to pray for healing' in which the male speaker suggests it is not God's sovereignty but as the body is made up of the dust of the earth and God gave humans charge over that it is not about asking God to heal but ordering the body stop causing pain and work as it should. Though sometimes it might take lots of telling. 

I know these ideas are out there and not new, I know the damage they can cause, I do believe God can heal today and that sometimes that is in a dramatic way.  I don't know why one and not another, even in Jesus' day there were others around the pool on the day he asked the man if he wanted to be healed, no reference to their healings.

When I spend time with church people who have forgotten to look outwards, or that being church is about inviting people to meet God rather than a nice club, I want to be able to celebrate the churches that are speaking about the gospel, but these clips are part of what makes me nervous and feel unable to cheer them on.  Not because I always have it right, nor my churches, or denomination - but .... something in my gut chokes the cheer because life is so much messier and greyer.

Healing and wellness.... (Part 1)

It's been a while, life has been so massively busy - church anniversaries, dog show and pet services, fetes and shows, and demolishing a church kitchen!

Now a couple of days off, time to draw breath.

I feel I ought to follow up from this post.  I did go through the emotional engagement that the counsellor wanted me to, and I think it was helpful in that space and time, but as my depression had already subsided it is hard to assess for any effects.  You can't test the roof patch until the next storm to see if it leaks again or not.

It maybe part of not fully feeling comfortable with my particular counsellor, but I felt that the process was regarded as a fix all. That having completed it in an acceptable way my depression will be all but gone and as I go into next winter when it usually flares up it won't and I will be seeing the doctor to wean off meds.  Ok she acknowledged a time lag as I adjust to what happened in the process but essentially it was all guaranteed as a logical progression.  I have had my last session with her, though she spent half the time explaining why I should go back during the adjustment time.

What is healing? or wellness for that matter?

I am part of a group trying to get something together in our rural town about support for mental health but also in a proactive way building people up to better cope with the stresses that come. As a community group we got a free stall at the local Agricultural Show last Saturday - and we needed to find a name and the working title we are running with is the Wellness Group.  We didn't have any events to plug yet but I took 170 odd mini grey cakes and resources from Time to Change and local carer support.  It was a very long day and we found some great people who are willing to help us and come with specialised skills, so very much worth it.

I sat with others involved at the start of the day and we tried to decide what Wellness meant to us in terms of the group.  Images around 'freedom to be', 'at ease', 'supported' were our conclusions, ideas that can go alongside and in despite of problems, stresses, health concerns etc rather than images of the absence of them.  It can be the removal of the unnecessary burdens that land on top of the core issue, and if the core problem can be relieved and removed then wonderful, but in a world where that is so often not the case then there can still be ways to reach towards wellness, to celebrate wholeness.