Today it is grumpy Great Dane, not a roaring or aggressive animal, but a presence that is too big to ignore and if sitting on top of you it is hard to shift and get out of bed to face the world.
Churchill made the ‘Black Dog’ euphemism for depression well known and I found the pictures of Matthew Johnstone using the image incredibly helpful back when I was at my worst. I began to refer to ‘doggy days’ when I have had tough days, but there is a huge variety of those so a friend started to ask ‘what kind of dog?’There are days when it is a little yappy dog – annoying, noisy (ideas in the head about my inadequacies) but actually small enough to control and ‘kennel’.
There are days when it is a border collie – amiable enough it seems yet somehow still controlling.
I still have occasional Rottweiler days, but also days of the calm lap dog – small enough to control, but still present.
Today though it is a grumpy Great Dane who has had its paws on my shoulders pinning me down and it has taken until now – teatime – before I achieved anything (and that is still in my dressing gown. As there was no-where I had to be I call this my day off for the week and try and catch up tomorrow. I am blessed with the freedom in this job to do that, and am thankful.
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